Table of Contents
Introduction
Marriage truly is a gift. For those of us who have been lucky enough to find the right partner, marriage can mean a lifetime of joy.
However, like any long-term relationship, it can also come with challenges and profound moments of growth.
Life has a funny way of testing us, and it will surely test our marriages. From juggling different schedules to raising kids, managing your household and finances, and finding space for your own needs and dreams.
Marriage can present many moments where you might feel the tug and pull between the many facets that make up your combined lives.
Sometimes, it can even feel like you are out of balance and out of sync.
The important thing to remember is that it’s normal to sometimes fall out of harmony, but it does not have to spiral out of control.
As long as you take the time to re-center and re-balance the unity that drew you both together and bound you in holy matrimony.
Of course, at the center of your marriage, I strongly believe, should be an unwavering focus on faith.
The divine holiness of marriage, ordained by God from the very beginning of time.
I am certainly not writing this article from a place of having it all together and figured out.
I’m not a marriage counselor, and I am also not a pastor. I am, however, just like you. I’m a wife and a woman of faith.
I am still growing, learning, and finding myself having to lean on God’s wisdom to help me through the unpleasant moments.
What I do know is this: When my husband and I invite God into our marriage, it changes the way we speak, act, and think about and toward each other.
We are not two separate units walking parallel to each other in life. We are two halves of a whole.
We each have our own unique attributes, skills, and roles, yet intertwined in a single goal for the betterment of our marriage and children.
With God at the center, our marriage is rooted in a steady foundation that cannot easily shift from underneath our feet. Everything we build above it is solid, thought-out, and lasting.
Even during the difficult times, our common faith is the thread that keeps us united and tethers us back to the root of our union and what matters most.
So if you haven’t invited God into your marriage yet, this is my invitation to you to join me on this journey.
With God as our anchor, we can all learn to benefit from the strength we can draw from Him to nurture our marriages and develop the strength, patience, and grace that are needed to enjoy a lifetime of happiness.
This week, I will share two simple steps you can begin applying immediately to your marriage to help you both strengthen your bond and surrender deeper into God’s plan for your union.
It’s my prayer that you will be blessed for years to come by taking these first steps I’m bringing to you in this article.
The Importance of a Christ-Centered Marriage
Before we address the two simple steps for actively bringing God into the center of your marriage, the first thing I want you to understand is that there is a big difference between a marriage where God is part of it versus a marriage where God is at the center of it.
In a Christ-centered marriage, faith becomes the very binding thread that holds every aspect of your marriage intact.
It is the core, the heartbeat, the coursing blood that keeps your marriage alive.
If you believe God is your firm foundation, then He must also be the foundation of your marriage.
How you heed His words and wisdom will determine how you handle challenges, differences, disagreements, forgiveness, and communication.
When we embrace a Christ-centered marriage, we are reminded that our life’s journey is not just about us. Instead, we come to realize it is about something much greater, set into motion thousands of years ago.
Our companionship exists as a sacred part of Creation.
Our roles and clearly defined gender differences are not advantages or disadvantages but holy ordinances created by the Lord, and they should be honored, valued, and protected.
Our ability to grow a family is a blessing and an opportunity to partake in just a fraction of the awesomeness of Creation.
A marriage built to reflect God’s love will always show grace for imperfections and patience during slower periods of personal growth.
It will exemplify sacrifice for the betterment of the other and joy in the reward of seeing the other person succeed.
When we seek God’s presence to guide us in every aspect of our marriage, we are equipped with the strength, love, and forgiveness that our marriage needs.
Building Your Faith Together
If you don’t already have a Christ-centered marriage but would love to build one, there are simple, small steps to help you get started.
I’ll share a couple of my favorites, and I recommend starting with just one. Allow your faith to organically grow and guide you to the next step.
Actively practicing your faith in marriage doesn’t have to involve grand displays. In fact, the most meaningful aspects of faith in a marriage are often found in the smallest, simplest moments and daily practices.
Pray Together
Let me start by saying this: Neither my husband nor I were raised in a church. Neither of us was religious for the majority of our lives, though we each had a sense that something greater was out there.
For those who know my story, you’ll know how my journey in faith developed and deepened tenfold over the past five years.
For those who don’t, I can summarize it by saying that just as I entered my “baby Christian” phase, my life was catapulted into a nightmarish existence.
We almost lost our son, who was just a baby, to a horrible disease, followed by almost losing our home and vehicles.
Every day was a test, and this cosmic exam lasted two years straight, with no reprieve in sight.
The burden on our hearts, minds, bodies, and finances was heavy, and there were many times we could have easily broken.
The only thing that carried me through that time was my decision to surrender completely to Jesus and accept Him as my Lord.
I could go on for pages detailing that journey, but for the purpose of this article, I’ll leave it at that.
I do invite you to explore more of my story in my bestselling book, Limitless Women: Charting the Path to Unstoppable Success, where I share how God was woven into every part of my experience—how He spoke to me, comforted me, and carried me through the fire.
The point of sharing this backstory is to tell you that neither of us really prayed, and we certainly didn’t pray together.
In fact, when I first chose to get baptized, I didn’t even tell my husband. Not because I was afraid, but because I knew we were on such divergent paths when it came to faith that there was no common ground or shared understanding.
My baptism was a deeply personal and meaningful moment in my life. The only people I shared it with were my youngest sister-in-law, my pastor, and his wife.
It was a bittersweet moment because my husband was not there. I knew he would not have been as fully understanding and supportive then as he is today.
I began attending church regularly before we were pregnant with our son, and it took almost three years before my husband willingly stepped into a service with me.
It wasn’t until he witnessed the undeniable evidence of God’s hand in my life and our son’s journey that he finally reconciled with the truth that God was a mighty force actively working in our lives—when we invited Him in.
Today, my husband is baptized by full immersion, born again, and we attend church together, looking forward to the joy of communal worship.
Most importantly, we pray together every night before bed with our children.
We believe prayer holds a binding power within our marriage and family that keeps us grounded and united.
Our prayers are nothing fancy—certainly not as fluid or eloquent as those of our pastor or church elders—but they don’t have to be. They just have to be genuine.
God knows what is in your heart. He already knows what is troubling and weighing on you. He simply desires you to reach out and speak to Him because He wants a relationship with you.
After all, what good father wouldn’t want to have a strong and honest relationship with their child?
I also pray for my husband when we’re apart, and he does the same for me. It’s about lifting each other up, supporting each other’s needs and dreams, and praying for protection over each other’s vulnerabilities and shortcomings.
As husband and wife, you are not just life partners—you are spiritual partners.
Study Scripture as a Couple
I encourage you to set aside time to read scripture and reflect on it together.
It doesn’t matter if you’re reading the same scripture or not, although if you do decide to begin this journey together, I highly recommend it.
For example, my husband and I both read our Bibles regularly, but we aren’t reading the same scriptures.
I believe in studying the Bible from the very beginning, so I started with Genesis and have been making my way through the Old Testament into the New Testament.
There are differing opinions on which book to study first, but I see the New Testament as a fluid continuation of the Old.
My husband, however, was eager to dive into the Gospels, so he started with the New Testament.
Ultimately, it doesn’t matter how you choose to study the Bible.
What matters is that you take time to share what you’ve read and learned, express your takeaways, and reflect on how those lessons apply to your lives and marriage.
If you can commit daily, that’s amazing. If not, that’s okay too. Even just once a week, taking 10 minutes to discuss scripture, can provide invaluable time to connect and recenter.
You’d be surprised at the level of perspective and personal growth you’ll experience together as you do this.
Moments like these open the space for you to grow spiritually side by side and align your lives with God’s purpose for your marriage.
It’s a journey that will draw you closer to God and to each other.
7-Day Challenge for Building a Christ-Centered Marriage
This week I challenge you to try these simple seven daily steps to grow your marriage closer tether it deeply in God’s presence.
Day 1: Pray Together Focus: Start inviting God into your marriage.
Challenge: Spend 5-10 minutes praying together as a couple. Keep it simple and heartfelt.
Reflection: How did it feel to connect spiritually through prayer? Did it shift your perspective or mood?
Day 2: Share a Scripture Focus: Reflect on God’s Word as a couple.
Challenge: Read a Bible verse together that speaks to marriage (e.g., Ephesians 5:25 or Ecclesiastes 4:12). Discuss how it applies to your relationship.
Reflection: What did you learn from each other’s insights? How can you apply this to strengthen your bond?
Day 3: Pray for Each Other Individually Focus: Lift your spouse up in prayer.
Challenge: Pray specifically for your spouse—thank God for their strengths, and ask for guidance in areas they may struggle.
Reflection: How did praying for your spouse shift your heart and mindset toward them?
Day 4: Express Gratitude Focus: Cultivate appreciation and love.
Challenge: Write a short note or verbally express three things you’re grateful for about your spouse.
Reflection: How did this moment of gratitude impact your connection?
Day 5: Practice Selflessness Focus: Reflect God’s love through action.
Challenge: Do one small act of kindness for your spouse that reflects Christ’s servant heart (e.g., take over a chore, plan a surprise, or give them time to rest).
Reflection: How did this act of selflessness impact your relationship dynamic?
Day 6: Study Scripture Together Focus: Deepen your spiritual connection.
Challenge: Set aside 10-15 minutes to read and discuss a passage from the Bible. Share what stood out to you and how it relates to your life and marriage.
Reflection: Did this time provide clarity or insight into your marriage and God’s plan for it?
Day 7: Reflect on the Week Focus: Celebrate progress and invite God to continue working in your marriage.
Challenge: Together, reflect on how these challenges impacted your relationship. Discuss ways to continue inviting God into your marriage. End the challenge with a prayer of gratitude.
Reflection: What did you notice about your connection this week? How can you sustain this momentum moving forward?
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